1st June 2017
Just because there's an election going on doesn't mean the rest of the world has stopped. My friends are finishing their exams. I'm working on the last section of my novel which seems, for some reason, to have decided it hates me and wants to get stuck. We're currently trying to figure out which day my cousin will come back from Lithuania so I can actually see him.
The whole thing is taking a toll on my anxiety-and my sleeping habits. One of the symptoms of AS is liking to know when and how everything is happening-we don't like to have things sprung on us or to suddenly have to change plans. No one's really sure why-some theorise it's to do with control or problems adjusting with change. But with me, it means sometimes I have to stop messaging someone halfway through a conversation to take stock, and calm my breathing down. It means sometimes, something as simple as sending someone a link can take me three days to do, and leave me exhausted afterwards. It means that, for me, campaigning is both something I'm looking forward to and dreading.
When you hear how AS can dominate your life, you tend to think of the big things, like meltdowns and freakouts and screaming. But it can be little things, like making a phone call, that trip you up.
There's also the fact that my parents worry that I-and, by extension, my generation-spend too much time in front of screens. It's hardly unique to me-my aunt, the other week, took her life in her hands and wrestled the phones from her three snarling children, who sat there throughout a dinnertime chomping at the bit, like tigers deprived of their kill-but it means that our parents, at times, seem to have the impression that all we're doing is staring at a screen, jaws hanging open, eyes in a permanently somnolent half-closed position, when actually, the majority of the time I'm on my laptop, I'm working, researching, or writing. When I start A-levels, they'll be on my laptop, too. God knows why lying on your bed working doesn't seem to count as working, to some people.
Either way, there's some encouragement today, as Theresa May seems to be heading for seats you wouldn't think the Tories had a chance of getting. Given Lynton Crosby's leading the campaign for the last week, looks like he's got something up his sleeve. He ain't called the Wizard Of Oz for nothing.
Labour have-optimistically-said they'd attempt to govern with a minority, which, while still sending my CCHQ contacts into mirth, is also them shooting themselves in the foot-they'd be relying on the Lib Dems and the Greens for support in the Commons. And, judging by what went down on the TV last night, that's a situation not many would want. If it came to pass, the government would probably make it to five months, if that.
If that was the case, the Tories would win the autumn election, and we'd end up with Prime Minister Boris Johnson. Wonder what Emily Thornberry would make of that?